3 Types of Love in the Bible

Group of friends hanging out at the beach

When it comes to love, our modern culture has a plethora of definitions, ranging from infatuation to unconditional commitment. However, it's essential to recognize that the Bible offers a much more profound understanding of love, providing a rich understanding of what it means to genuinely love someone.

We find three types of love outlined in the Scriptures: Agape, Phileo and Eros. Each one serves a unique purpose and adds a different dimension to our lives, all while drawing us closer to God--the source of all love. Let's dive deep into each of these biblical concepts of love.

Agape: Unconditional Love

Agape love is the pinnacle of love. It's a selfless, sacrificial, unconditional love. When Jesus laid down His life for all mankind, that was the purest form of agape love. This is the kind of love that God has for us and it's the love He calls us to have for one another. As 1 John 4:8 states, "Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love."

This love isn't about feelings or emotions. it's a choice, a commitment. When Jesus says, "Love your enemies" (Matthew 5:44), He's talking about agape love. It's easy to love those who love us back, but agape love calls us to go beyond that, to extend love even when it's not reciprocated. Agape love is also the foundational love that allows us to live out the first and second greatest commandments: to love God with all our heart, soul and mind and to love our neighbor as ourselves (Matthew 22:37-39).

Phileo: Brotherly Love

Phileo love refers to brotherly love and is most commonly experienced in deep friendships. It's that connection you feel with a lifelong friend or the bond between siblings. This love involves feelings of warmth and affection towards someone else. While phileo love is beautiful and adds richness to our lives, it does have its limits. Unlike agape love, it can be conditional and depends on the people involved in the relationship. This is where Philadelphia, Pennsylvania comes from, as it means “the city of brotherly love.”

In the New Testament, we see phileo love represented between Paul and Timothy, and Jesus Himself had close friends like Lazarus, Mary and Martha, illustrating that even the Son of God valued phileo love.

This kind of love allows us to connect on a deeper emotional level with those around us and it plays a vital role in building community within the Church. Acts 2:42-47 shows us that the early church was characterized by this kind of relational love, creating a sense of unity and mutual care. This kind of love can be demonstrated in a small group Bible study, for example.

Eros: Romantic Love

Eros love or romantic love, is probably the most familiar to most people, but it's often misunderstood. Contrary to what our culture sometimes suggests, eros is not scandalous or only based on physical attraction. In the biblical context, eros love is a beautiful, God-given desire that compels us to commit to and unite with someone in marriage.

Eros love is powerful but should be grounded in agape love for it to be sustaining and fulfilling. If eros love is not built upon a foundation of unconditional love and commitment, it becomes fleeting and shallow.

The Integration of Love Types in Our Lives

In our walk with Christ, these three types of love are not separate but integrated. Our relationships should be a blend of agape, phileo and when applicable, eros love. Agape love sets the foundation, allowing us to unconditionally love God and others. Phileo love deepens our relationships, creating meaningful connections, while eros love adds a unique dimension to marital relationships, bringing two people together in a divine union.

Recognizing these biblical types of love allows us to walk in a fuller understanding of God's love for us. It enriches our relationships, provides a foundation for community and helps us be a light to the world. After all, we are called to radiate God's glory and love and understanding these aspects of love empowers us to do just that. So let's be examples of God's multifaceted love in a world desperately in need of it.

3 Types of Love in the Bible: Summary

Type of Love Description
Agape (Unconditional Love) Agape love is selfless, sacrificial and unconditional. It's not about feelings or emotions but a choice and a commitment, even towards those who may not reciprocate the love.
Phileo (Brotherly Love) Phileo love is experienced in deep friendships, embodying warmth and affection. Unlike agape, it can be conditional and depends on the people involved.
Eros (Romantic Love) Eros love is a God-given desire leading to marriage, it should be grounded in agape love to be sustaining and fulfilling.
These types of love are integrated in a Christian's life, enriching relationships and helping individuals radiate God's love and glory.
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