The Knocking - Poem

wood pallet in turquoise and white painted color scheme

This poem expresses the journey of my relationship with Jesus during a very difficult season. Even when I wanted to hide, He still gently beckoned me closer to His heart.

I know that I was made for more

But here I am on the floor

With rivers of tears flowing down my cheeks

I've always known I was a girl who seeks



I seek, but I can't seem to find

Will this brokenness ever leave my heart?

Will this fog ever leave my mind?

Surely, I'm not just the girl who's blind



No, I am redefined

One of a kind

Purposefully designed

Yet, I can't seem to escape these chains that bind



My Father says that I'm His daughter

But this here clay doesn't always understand her Potter



I'm never satisfied

But I need to rest

I feel so much stress

Sometimes it's hard to accept God's best



Being content with where I am

That's a concept I can't quite understand



Oh, I need to measure up

I tell myself I'm not good enough

I haven't accomplished all this stuff

This state of living is very rough



I try so hard to keep the storms in me at bay

Can someone get me out of this gray?

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, they say.

But sometimes I'm just not okay



Jesus continues to knock

But the thought of Him looking inside

Makes me want to run and hide



I'm still a bit scared

Will He like what I share?

He pulls up a chair

Lord, what's that… over there?



Afraid to receive His love

I control our conversation

It seems like a one-way street

Why are fearful thoughts on repeat?



He'll talk to me soon

Jesus, don't come into my room

This tension, I hate it

Lord, just take it!



I try to let my walls fall like Jericho

But I rebuild them for fear of letting go

I'm trapped in the wilderness

Lord, get me out of this!



Slow down

Relationships take time

Though I can't feel it

I'm still connected to the Vine



Instead of floating in the intimate sea

I feel like it's drowning me

He already knows I want my vision

But I'm too afraid to behold His incision



Wrong thoughts of the Healer break my heart

Can we please go back to the start

Before I fell apart

But if we did, we wouldn't have this work of art



They say I walk by faith and not by sight

Perhaps they are quite right

But at times I'd rather believe my feelings

This can lead to some tricky dealings



All of my tears are not a waste

Even Jesus wept because of God's grace



Yes, there's a cost for knowing the love of the cross

At first this investment seems like a loss

But be patient, it takes time to get rid of the dross



Joy comes in the mourning

Through tears, fears and struggles that last even years

Present suffering produces future glory

Wow, my Father knows how to write a redemption story!



He says, "Come with Me,

I'll show you who you're created to be

To the door of your heart

I've got the key

But please let me in and dine with Me."



Soon you'll run wild

Unashamed to be His child



So hang on tight

He'll turn your darkness into light

Faith is worth the fight

In the end you'll be alright



You were made for so much more

Give Jesus your heart and open the door!


Previous
Previous

In the Middle - Poem

Next
Next

Scars - Poem